Say It!—A Christian Hack for Living Better

If you are Christian…

Say it aloud. Say that you have been lifted out of poverty because you have. Say that you have been lifted out of debt; out of defeat; out of bondage and disease. Say it!

If you don’t say it, you won’t see it. Say that the Lord is your wisdom and your sanctification and your redemption and your righteousness.

Refuse to observe lying vanities by keeping mute. Refuse to shudder at the petering bank statements and demand letters, that give a contrary narrative of who you are.

Hold fast to your proclamations for you also have to exercise patience after you have done the will of God.

Advertisements

The Issue of Body Image

PIC1

 

Recently, I got some really incredible feedback about my book, The Code: A Simple Story About Raising Great Women that made me reflect about of the subject of body-image as it impacts on how successful a women become in life.

A working mom-in the oil and gas industry-told me that reading the book had helped her become sensitive to the struggle her chubby teenage daughter was beginning to experience because of her weight;so much so that the girl had now been prodding her parents to change schools because of the way she felt about her body.

As a parent, your role is to give your daughter control of her body-image. And while the roles diverge for mother and father on helping a daughter feel good about her looks, the real idea behind giving the girl-child control over her body-image is based on the fact that how she feels about her body and her ability to take charge of her life travel in the same direction. If your daughter feels good about her looks, her self-confidence skyrockets and this is a good thing, no matter what stage of life she’s at.

The thing to note here is that a daughter will take on the body-image of her mom without her mother having to say a word. So, if a mother struggles with her body-image, the daughter would most likely do too. My book asks mothers to learn to take control of their daughter’s body-image by taking control of their own through dieting and exercise.

And while mothers have the sole task of  mirroring positive body-images to their daughters, fathers have the role to affirming mother and daughter about their body-image. The reason, females are wired to think that if you aren’t saying nice things about them, then there is really nothing positive to say which is why the men in their lives need to be intentional about the words they use, particularly as it affects body-image.


I teach nine other ideas in this book to help you raise your daughter which you can get here on Amazon.

 

 

 

 

Depression: Let’s Talk


Many people approach the subject of depression from areas -I think-they find safe. Some people look at depression from the standpoint of religion. They think that depressed people are people without any faith-based hope and then pontificate about spiritiality in a way that defeats helping sufferers.
Others, particularly in third world countries, look at it from economics; their cause of depression being impoverishment of all sorts; and how people’s economic inabilities provide a very succinct environment for depression. And yet these people-in my estimation- misconstrue suffering with depression and end up describing something else.

Then, there are the nerdy ones who look at depression purely from the view point of medical science. In their definition, depression is a mood disorder; a mental sickness characterized by prolonged spells of sadness and disinterest; often  managable with a class of drugs called antidepressants. For these ones, depression has little connection with a man’s spirit or his body. It is a mind sickness and that’s it. And in their own words, they’d say, ‘Get tested’ or ‘Get help.’

But depression is more than a condition of prolonged sadness. It is the offshoot of a misalignment between the spirit, mind and body. You see, even though science fails to acknowledge the Spirit that man is because it fails explain what animates a man’s body, something certainly separate a living man from a corpse that died a moment ago. So settle this, you are a spirit, living in a body and you have a mind. But for the purpose of this post, allow me to describe each of these as a component of a whole, even though it doesn’t truly do justice to man’s composition.

In any case, your Spirit, Mind and Body need nurturing by way of inspiration, mental stimulation, food and exercise to required proportions that differ from person to person.  You (spirit) need to be inspired by words, pictures and acts every day; the same way your mind needs to be stimulated with things that keep you positive and hopeful; the same way your body needs food and exercise. 

As a person of faith, while I understand that clinical methods for dealing with depression have proven effective in some cases because of how these remedies deal with mind-based depression, they have failed woefully when the source of the depression arose out a deficiency in the spirit or the body. It is how medical science came up with the term, ‘incurable depression’ which some are now using as a case to support doctor-assisted suicide for patients diagnosed with it.
My point is, once there is a misalignment resulting from a prolonged neglect to feed any one of these three-Spirit, mind and body-with the appropriate stuff, depression happens.

But…let’s talk.

Hugs


God, when He made us, covered us up in skin putting tiny receptacles on it called pores to help us interpret touch.

Our bodies were designed to interpret heat, cold, pain and pleasure based on physical contact with externals. But beyond this, they also serve to interpret feelings of gratitude, disgust, joy, sadness and love.

A good way we use our bodies to serve us and our loved ones is through hugs. A hug given, is a hug received. Doctors say that hugging is so important to human health and stability that we need to give and receive hugs daily.

In fact, renowned family therapist, Virginia Satir says, ‘We need four hugs a day for survival. We need eight hugs a day for maintenance. We need twelve hugs a day for growth.’

And this isn’t just for children, adults too need hugs. We need hug for reassurance, to feel loved or accepted by the people we love. Hugs can also be an effective way to deal with stress.

Hugs also communicate relational peace between people. Certain cultural and religious groups use hugs to express harmony among members. Jews for instance, greet with hugs…the French, the Spaniards and the Italians too, stemming from the influences of the Catholics as far back as the 1st Century.

Hugs on the whole, communicate love; the warmth of an embrace, coupled with a shared kiss is the universal serenade for the soul.

Hugs make the world around us a little smaller, closing up the spaces that exist between us. They make us kin and in the end, leave us more open, vulnerable and interdependent on each other.

A hug is the ultimate expression of our shared existence. 

Give me a hug!

The End of Suffering

sufferingsmall

 

It is unfortunate how some people go through life year in, year out—suffering. The resignation that overcomes their daily existence is extraordinary. Suicide has been the only evil they haven’t yet fully contemplated because someone said, ‘where there is life, there is hope’.  If this has been you for a long time, and you somehow still believe that your life can change, this blog is confirmation that it can. And all you need, you already have. So permit me to ask you a few questions;

What can you see?

I mean, what can you see yourself become with your mind’s eye? God gave you your imagination to create your own future. What you have today were the things you imagined –whether you agree with this or not. Your current existence was designed in your mind. To change it, you have got to see a new future with your mind.

What curse are you living under?

Suffering is most often self-inflicted. Maybe someone told you you’d be a failure in life, and YOU believed her. Or they said you’d never amount to anything much, and YOU believed them.  It was you who added fuel to the fire—you! You accepted the curse, made it a self-limiting belief and now you are living it out. And only you can end the power of that curse over your life by withdrawing the belief you put in it all these years. Be done with anything that puts you in a box.

What are your common talking points?

Life only gives you what you demand and not a penny more.  Singer Frank Edwards was so right when he said, ‘what you say is what you get, so say the right things all the time. Listen to yourself when you talk and catch yourself. Suffering is the fruit of cheap, negative talk. Your talk is your postcode in life. Suffering people talk fear, bills, inability and poverty; which is why they have these things in abundance. Change your talk and change your life. It doesn’t matter if you are reading this by accident on someone’s device, change your talk. Say that you are worthy. Say that you can.  Make up your mind that you will NEVER again tell yourself, ‘I can’t’; or ‘it is impossible’ or any other self-limiting words. Talk yourself out of the suffering.

Who do you trust?

Do you trust God? Suffering people don’t and their circumstances are most times, the proof. You have trusted men and they have failed you because that is who they are. God says to trust Him with all your might and lean not to your own understanding; in all your ways, acknowledge Him and He shall direct your paths. This is not about religion, God did not design you suffer or fail. You are created in his image and likeness and suffering is not consistent with your design.

Notice, I didn’t blog about money or people or any external stuff. The struggle is in your mind and if you can grapple with the questions I have asked, your suffering can be over as soon as you’re done reading this.

Success Mastery: 4 Quick Tips

 

life-doesnt-have-a-remote

 

Here are 4 quick tips you should be considering as we enter the last week of February if the year has still not gotten off to a real start for you:

Have Rituals

Happiness is about progress. And to make progress you need rituals whether it is working out, praying, meditating, reading your Bible or blogging. Success is determined by the things you do daily.

 Tell Yourself The Truth

Next, tell yourself the truth about where you are. You need to be at home with the progress you are making. If you are always broke and need to make progress financially, maybe it time  you took stock; knowing your personal balance sheet like the back of your hand. Track expenses , plan from where you are and institute some process for accountability.

Be Self-Motivated

Find a compelling story that will drive you to where you want to be. Why do you have to sell today? Why do you have to workout? Why do you have to read that book? What will your family benefit from your learning how to sell products on Amazon? Look for motivation from within and use it as fuel for your success.

Be Resourceful

Resources will not always be available but drawing on your resourcefulness is invaluable. You use what you have to get to where you are going.

Now I would typically have dropped this on a Monday but I think someone out there really needed to read this today… and reflect  on paper how to use these 4 tips to make quick changes before we are way into the year.

With love and great respect,

Nehi

 

 

The Power Of Meditation


Several years ago,  while in college, I had an accident, having dreamt about it the morning before . I slipped and fell along the stairway of an uncompleted building which at the time, didn’t have a bannister to prevent me from slipping further through the middle of a cement flight of stairs, from the first floor to the ground. It was terrible; the pain I felt in my abdomen, so excruciating, I wouldn’t even wish it upon an enemy.

Long story short, I didn’t go to the hospital to get checked even though I knew I should have. As a person of faith, I  had seen and even been instrumental to the faith-healing of many at school. And so I felt I’d have been embarrassed if as a faith-healer, I couldn’t heal myself.So here’s what I did. I collected every thought from the Bible about healing and began say them and thinking deeply on them every morning and once at night and in a few days, what I thought was an experiment became a miracle.

Now, you may think that the pain co-incidentally left me after a few days, but I quickly noticed that this exercise also worked with getting money and imroving my grades significantly.

As I inundated my mind with Bible- thoughts on finances and intelligence,  I saw marked improments in those areas.

Now, this shouldn’t  be something you brush off too quickly. Give it a try and see how this might be the part you are missing on the road to success.

Have a great weekend