We are Our Thoughts

There is a way to think that is powerful.

The Bible says, ‘As a person thinks, so is he or she’.* Therefore, we are our thoughts.

However, science shows that human beings have an average of 15,000 thoughts per day. Passive thoughts that just come and go. These passive thoughts can become so entrenched that they determine our habits and eventually run our lives. This is not God’s idea.

God’s idea is for us to think actively. To dominate and determine the thoughts we have. To think purposefully. **

In the end, thinking must be active, not passive for us. You must decide how you think. Instead of letting your mind wander from one thought to the other, decide to think rich, think healthy and think like a you have a large inheritance because the Bible says you do.

If you catch yourself thinking passively today, stop and think with intent.

We are our thoughts.

*Proverbs 23:7

**Philippians 4:8

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The State of Our Marriages

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I have a passion for marriage. But I have an even deeper passion for how marriage is the apt depiction of our walk with the Lord Jesus Christ. Of course, by our walk with the Lord Jesus Christ, I presuppose that you have been born-again and spirit-filled with the evidence of speaking in tongues. But if you haven’t, please do not be deterred as the intention of this post is to communicate a vitality of the Jesus message as it regards your marriage. Continue reading “The State of Our Marriages”

You Are a Person

Sometimes, all some people want is for you to be a role: husband, wife, father, boss, son or friend. And that’s all. They aren’t interested you, your likes or dislikes,and so on.

As far as you play your role like an actor following his or her lines, they are fine. They’ll reward you. After all, that’s why we have the Oscars.

But the problem is, because they don’t see you for who you really are, they lose a lot. And this is sad, both ways . It deprives you of the opportunity to be a blessing to them while depriving them of a similar opportunity to be blessed by you.

In many mentor-mentee relationships this is very common. Blinded by shortcomings, or the personal need to understand their own selves, some people leave when they should stay; run away when they should stick around; judge when they should pray. And all of that.

If you’ve been blighted by such a gaff in any of your relationships, it’s the tale of most of human existence; that all of us, somehow, want to be loved for who we are, and not for the roles we play; for being a person, not a colleague or a driver or a mother or a step son; that we get noticed for the haircut or the new dress or the freckles that are strewn on our faces; to know that we can connect with you in a visceral way when you ask, ‘How are you?’ It appears that when we know this, that you truly care, then we whip out the person that we are—good or bad.

And yet, when striking up a conversation with any person for the first time, we often clutch at platitudes for follow up questions like ‘What do you do?’ or ‘Where do you work?’and answers like, ‘Oh I am an accountant’ or ‘I am a house wife’ not mattering who asks… or who answers.

We quickly look past the person to what they do or rather, what they can do…for us; never really bothering what we can do for, with and through them.

It’s a shortsightedness that almost all of us have been socialized by; to look past a person to their the commercial, social or emotional benefit without thinking; to look past ourselves to what we do, more than who we are.

You are not what you do for me or her or anybody. You are a person–with an essence. And if you ever find someone who focuses on who you are–your worth– you should never let them go.

May your week be blessed with victories.

Look for Your Mentees

No vision can be fulfilled during the lifetime of a visionary which is why identifying successors should form a pivotal aspect of executing your vision. From Bible evidence, it must be God’s idea, even in the family, for parents to mentor their children in the carriage of the family legacy.

As John C. Maxwell noted, ‘No one is ever successful without successors. ‘ And no matter what you currently do, there are people on our journey that ought to be your mentees.

But in Africa, leaders often do not take the time to look out mentees, let alone train them. And when they do mentor it’s often not with the right motives. Poor succession planning is the number one reason why African businesses rarely last three generations.

Looking actively for mentees is the sole responsibility of leadership and not vice versa. Jesus, the ultimate leader, went after his mentees; picking a vast array of men and women from all works of life to be his apprentices.

The Bible is strewn with this idea from Jacob the patriarch to David the king, strengthening my belief that it is God’s will for leaders to train and appoint their successors, and not leave it to chance.

If you have achieved any level of success in life, maybe it’s time to start passing the baton of your vision by deliberately picking out someone to mentor. That’s the secret to great leadership.

As Dr. Myles Munroe said, ‘To become a great leader you must be able to mentor leaders that are greater than yourself.’

Sex, Marriage and Infidelity

There is no such thing as premarital sex or sex before marriage. To have sex with any person is to marry that person.

This idea strengthens the notion of common-law marriage in which cohabitation is deemed a legal marriage in some parts. It is also the reason why some cultures fail to recognize a marriage as valid until it has been consummated via sexual intercourse.

Simply put, sex equals marriage. Even the good book says that to sleep with anyone is to become one flesh with them.

Now think about all the harm that fornication and adultery do in this world. If God created the sexual union called marriage to be manifestation of His image, imagine how He must feel each time His child indulges in sexual sin.

The good book says, God created man in His image, male and female. And for this reason, a man shall leave father and mother and cleave to his wife and the two shall become one flesh.

When a person cheats on a spouse, it isn’t just a stepping out of marriage for pleasure , revenge or whatever excuse there might be; it is the creation of a monstrosity that mocks the image of God.

Fidelity in marriage projects the image of God to the world in such a way that no other human relationships. As Ravi Zacharias puts it, ‘Marriage is the most sacred relationship you could ever enter into.’ Infidelity is therefore a distortion of the image of God as it regards God’s original intention for husband and wife.

2018: Information vs Knowledge [Must Read]

Information and knowledge have never been the same thing, even though I don’t know why we approach their acquisition alike. Perhaps, the education system is responsible for this gaffe. We sit down in class, church or seminars and just soak in the information without learning anything. And then wonder why we’re the same every year.

Information is passive. You listen. And many times than not, we listen for the sake of listening. And if we find subject boring, we simply shut it out and move on to the next activity, easy and simple.

Knowledge on the other hand, is active. You have to do to know. And I know this sounds contrived but this is the secret of the ages. It is why all the sermons you heard or the books you read made very little difference.To you, they were just information and not knowledge; a collection of stories to listen to and forget afterwards. You took no notes. You could rehearse the information from the notes you had taken and so you learnt nothing.

In 2018, go everywhere with a notepad and a camera. Be ready to capture new things coming to you as information. Knowledge is first acquired by taking notes. And then, acting on the information you got.

The moment you commit pen to paper something happens in your subconscious that triggers actual learning to take place. This is the background that all teachers of goal setting do not really mention. It is why a goal committed to paper in your own handwriting is ten times more likely to be achieved than a goal that stays a mental note.

If this is the only hack you apply in 2018, I think it would go a very long way in helping you become a better person.

After all, the Chinese say, ‘the palest ink is better than the best memory.’ While the former focuses on knowledge, the latter surrenders to being informed.