Hurt: The Vicious Cycle


Don’t wound people emotionally.

Something about how we treat people defines how they themselves treat other people. The point is, hurt people are more prone to demeaning others because of deep-seated wounds—whether the wounds are caused by rejection or verbal abuse.

Now, while I do not excuse hurtful outbursts because the behavior in itself is the result of poor emotional management, the intent of this post is to unravel the root cause of hurt whether we are at the giving or receiving end of it. It is also about the idea that no matter where you are on the wrung of emotional hurt, the responsibility of ending it rests first with you.

Emotional wounds only bear hardship for human beings. Allowed to fester, they create catastrophic outcomes in the family, society and world at large. They have been at the root of divorce, upsurges in crime and the plummet of whole societies into economic abyss.

Fidel Castro became a Communist because of emotional hurt; the criticism and hurt of the United States during his 1959 visit. Music icon, Tina Turner once tried to commit suicide by overdosing on Valium  because of emotional hurt- resulting from a turbulent marriage- before eventually divorcing her husband. The list is endless about people who somehow slipped up in one way or the other because of emotional hurt.

The important thing is that you have a duty is to end the vicious cycle through forgiveness if you have been a recipient of emotional abuse. And beyond forgiving this person or people, you may need to remove yourself from constant contact with them for  the sake of your own emotional health.

And if you have been the one perpetrating the hurt, sometimes unconsciously , it is time to stop. It’s apparent that unattended emotional wounds in your own heart that have created an platform for you to demean and undervalue the people you have been hurting. Something hurtful and left to fester; the loss of a loved one; the unrequited love of a crush; or the constant destructive criticism of a spouse or parent may have done this harm to you. Hurt only creates more hurt, so its time to end the vicious cycle.

If you have to get help, you’ll know.  Get help quickly because the end result of hurting others will leave you lonely in the end. The vicious cycle of hurt will isolate you eventually, so do something to end it.

There’ll be more tomorrow on this subject, so look out for the post.

Thanks for reading,


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